DUNCAN, OK BIRTH | BABY B

I paced my backyard while we talked on the phone for 45 minutes. It had been awhile since I’d last talked to her, and I wanted to hear all about how the Big Sisters were doing. 

Ashley would be my very first repeat client! I was honored to be able to tell Bryer’s birth story in 2017, and I was over-the-moon excited that they wanted me to come back to tell the birth story of their Baby Boy. 

We went over her birth plan, we talked about when she should contact me, and we discussed how she was hoping he would wait to come until McKenzie had finished up her out of state dance competition. I assured her the timing would probably all work out perfectly. 

About a week later she sent me pictures of her latest ultrasound. Brother was so low and squished that you could literally see the wrinkles in his forehead from the pressure! It wouldn’t be too many more days until Ashley would get to kiss that little forehead.

Saturday, 9:12am, I get THE text. Ashley had been contracting regularly since 3:00am. By 11:00am, she was 80% effaced and dilated to a 6. I was at the hospital shortly after the text, just in time to catch her taking a walk down the hall to help keep the contractions up and let gravity do its job on pulling Baby down. I just knew he would make his appearance in the next couple of hours.

The third child is often referred to as the ‘wild card’ among the brith community. They don’t always follow the pattern of the previous births. Bryer’s birth intensified fairly quickly and ended with just three pushes. Brother’s birth story would be altogether different.

By early afternoon, Ashley was exhausted. The contractions were coming every few minutes and were very intense. Before she was talking as she contracted, but by 1:00pm she really having to focus as she rode each wave. Even with the contractions getting stronger, she wasn’t dilating as quickly as we thought she would. Knowing that she would have to push her sweet boy out soon, she opted for an epidural so she could try to rest and conserve her energy.

At 5:52pm she was complete and ready to push. She pushed, and she pushed, and she pushed. There was not one contraction that she didn’t give all her strength to try and get her baby out. Chase was by her side encouraging her, and her Mom was cheering her on and helping with the 1-10 counts as she pushed. The nurses were her number one fans, telling her that she could do it with every contraction. After about forty-five minutes, Dr. Elfrink said that Brother was turned. He was head down, but he was facing the side in stead of facing down. Dr. Elfrink was going to have Ashley try different pushing techniques while she attempted to rotate the baby to a better position.

Births are unpredictable. All of them, not matter what.  Ashley wanted to have her baby vaginally, that was the plan, but because of how he was turned, when she pushed he was going down into her cervix instead of out of it. Dr. Elfink told Ashley that she was doing a great job, and that is was obvious she was pushing with everything she had, but that he wasn’t making a lot of progress. She would let her push longer if she wanted, but it was time for them to consider a c-seciton. It’s a big decision to make, and Dr. Elfink was there to support and serve them either way. Ashley and Chase talked about it, and decided together to move forward with the c-section.

The team moved quickly to get Ashley into the OR. Dad suited up, and went in the OR to hold his wife’s hand as they waited for their first baby boy to be born. Just two minutes after he sat down on the stool by Ashley’s head, Dr. Elfrink (grinning ear to ear) was holding up Baby Boy Graham over the blue curtain for them to see. 

Saturday, July 29, 2019 at 7:25pm, Brennan was born.

I’m always amazed at the team in the OR, each member busy doing their duty to ensure the safety and well-being of the momma and baby. It’s seamless. Ashley got to see and hold Brennan just a few minutes following his birth, and Chase got his first cuddles in the OR, too. After a little bit, the nurse’s baby told Chase that he could take Brennan back to the regular room. He looked at his wife and looked at me. Even with his mask on, I could see in his eyes that he wasn’t where he was needed most: with his brand new baby or with his wife. “I’ll stay with her,” I said, and he took a deep breath walked his little boy out of the OR.

I love taking pictures. I really do. Births are the most amazing moments I get to take pictures of, but you know what I think I love even more? Being there for the Moms. Ashley didn’t need a photographer after Chase took Brennan, she needed a friend. I was more than happy to take the camera away from my face and hold her hand while she dozed a little as the team finished taking care of her. Mommin’ is hard, and we all need support every once in awhile.

After what seemed like a thousand years, the Big Sisters were able to come back to the regular room and get their first peeks and hugs. Rest assured, this little brother will never be lacking for physical affection.

Maybe it happened in an OR instead of a regular room, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t special.

Maybe she saw him first over a curtain instead of pulled immediately on her chest, but that does’t make Brennan’s story any less valuable.

Maybe it didn’t go how they wanted, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a story worth telling.

When it’s all said and done, what really matters is that he’s here and he’s loved.

 And boy oh boy, is he loved.